Street Harassment
Jan. 28th, 2008 04:34 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
emmelinemayIt's still happening, but as I now have Obvious Headphones, I can pretend it isn't happening, and ignore it most of the time.
Here's what I wrote last year
(link is to the tagged entries, so scroll down past this one!)
Someone on![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
2wheelsbetter linked me to an article I thought fit quite well along with those rants, so those of you that were interested in those (which was broadly split between the women that understood, and the men that got offended and said BUT I'M NOT LIKE THAT to which I'd reply read this)
"Why do you think it's OK to harass women?" I said calmly, loudly. The man froze, then a look of fear washed over his features. He shrank like a worm. "What?" he snivelled, his eyes sliding to the floor. "I didn't say anything bad ..."
"It doesn't matter what you said, I didn't say that you could speak to me. It's not OK to whisper in a woman's ear when she's going about her business.
There are also some 'but WOMEN DO IT TOO' and yes, but 'I'M NOT LIKE THAT' comments to the article there too. I sincerely hope I don't have to explain to anyone reading why this makes me cross.
from one of the comments:
It would be great if, instead of claiming we're making a fuss about nothing, the decent men out there accepted that this *is* a problem for a lot of women and make it clear when they see it happening that they don't think harassing women is funny or acceptable.
Here's what I wrote last year
(link is to the tagged entries, so scroll down past this one!)
Someone on
2wheelsbetter linked me to an article I thought fit quite well along with those rants, so those of you that were interested in those (which was broadly split between the women that understood, and the men that got offended and said BUT I'M NOT LIKE THAT to which I'd reply read this)"Why do you think it's OK to harass women?" I said calmly, loudly. The man froze, then a look of fear washed over his features. He shrank like a worm. "What?" he snivelled, his eyes sliding to the floor. "I didn't say anything bad ..."
"It doesn't matter what you said, I didn't say that you could speak to me. It's not OK to whisper in a woman's ear when she's going about her business.
There are also some 'but WOMEN DO IT TOO' and yes, but 'I'M NOT LIKE THAT' comments to the article there too. I sincerely hope I don't have to explain to anyone reading why this makes me cross.
from one of the comments:
It would be great if, instead of claiming we're making a fuss about nothing, the decent men out there accepted that this *is* a problem for a lot of women and make it clear when they see it happening that they don't think harassing women is funny or acceptable.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
Re: i can't beleive i'm dignifying this with a response
Date: 2008-01-29 05:38 pm (UTC):)
Re: i can't beleive i'm dignifying this with a response
Date: 2008-01-29 05:38 pm (UTC)And I'd have had lots of babies, so I could get all that fabulous paid time off work!
Re: i can't beleive i'm dignifying this with a response
Date: 2008-01-30 09:25 am (UTC)I'll pick a couple for you.
1. Your accussed me of arrogance in my belief that fathers have an equal right to be parents as mothers. You also appear to believe fathers are not entitled to paternity leave on the same basis as women.
I find this both sexist and discriminatory I also find it to be extremely stereotyping to women as it suggests that only they are capable of fulfilling this role. Furthermore it degrades women by not allowing them the choice of whether they or their partner will be the main carer. Thus damaging their opportunities of returning to a career.
WILL YOU EXPLAIN WHY YOU FEEL MY POINT OF VIEW HERE TO BE WRONG.
2. How about your frankly luidicrous assertion that the decision to ban me from using Gyms at certain periods is NOT discrimination.
Please explain to me how this is not discrimination? I am male you have discriminated against me by suggesting I am some sort of pervert who cant use the Gym withouot leching over women. Infact you appear to beleive the majority of men do this. Furthermore you believe the correct way to cope with this is not to challenge the men responsible and have them thrown out of the Gym but in fact to section women away where they cant be seen.
Re: i can't believe i'm dignifying this with a response
Date: 2008-01-30 10:30 am (UTC)Nope.
Mainly because:
a) You have demonstrated a total lack of reading comprehension.
and
b) You have no ability to construct an argument
Therefore I feel there is little point in my addressing your points as
a) many of your points are based on you misreading what I wrote
b) even if I did address even the valid points, you'd misunderstand them anyway.
This conversation can do neither of us any good. The longer you go on, the more of a fool you are making of yourself. This conversation is not going to enrich, improve or enlighten my life in any way. I am not going to change your mind, you are not going to change mine.
Therefore, I have been doing the LJ equivalent of putting the yappydog outside the glass doors. it can yap all it likes, I don't have to hear it. Ergo, I've been ignoring you. I did, for a moment, ban you from commenting in my journal, but decided that was unfair, as it removed your right to reply to anyone else who felt they wanted to take on your comments, and so I unbanned you, and just left you to yap.
As for your comments about you defending me? That was many, many years ago. I was a very different person, with a lot of problems. I am no longer that person.
I now no longer care if people think me shallow. The people I care about know I'm not, the people I don't care about...I don't care about.
Re: i can't beleive i'm dignifying this with a response
Date: 2010-01-04 08:28 pm (UTC)Re: i can't beleive i'm dignifying this with a response
Date: 2010-01-04 08:49 pm (UTC)This is, truly, THE POST THAT WILL NOT DIE!
Re: i can't beleive i'm dignifying this with a response
Date: 2010-01-05 06:40 am (UTC)(Got here from the WTFsexist spotlight link, etc, hi!)
Yeah, it's a dead horse, and I'm waving a stick, but I just thought of something - is adults-only periods at a public pool terrible and discriminatory to the same degree that ladies-only gym hours are? If that is the case, I know a lot of little kids who would want to start their legal careers earlier.
Ok, done.
Re: i can't beleive i'm dignifying this with a response
Date: 2010-01-04 09:36 pm (UTC)Whilst I accept that the majority of individual males are NOT likely to cause any problems for women, this whole post is about the MINORITY of males who DO cause the problems, and who lead to things such as women-only hours in gyms.
You suggest that the correct way to deal with lecherous behaviour would be to 'challenge the men responsible'.
Indeed, this would be the ideal way to cope with this, but many women don't feel empowered enough to do so, largely due to a culture of belittling women's experiences, which you are an ardent perpetrator in.
Therefore, if you so dislike women-only hours, the 'correct way to cope' would not be to whinge about it, but rather to support women and try to empathize with their experiences, so that they have the support to challenge the minority of men who make life hell- and who stop you from going to the gym for an hour in the evenings.
Re: i can't beleive i'm dignifying this with a response
Date: 2008-01-30 09:32 am (UTC)I see that when your talking about these men who grope you daily and harass you its perfectly acceptable for you to make gross generalisations and then say it's irrelevant that individuals dont behave like that.
However... when suggested the other way round you take a gross generalisation and then say it ridiculous because you individually dont subscribe.
Hypocritical much?