Open Letter

[emmelinemay]

Dear Mr White Van Man,

A note on the concept of 'right of way.' If you are coming out of a junction, turning right, and there is oncoming traffic on the road you are turning out on, it is that oncoming traffics' right of way.

The right of way is not rescinded if that oncoming traffic happens to be a bicycle, ridden by a female. In addition, the right of way still applies even in the event that you failed to look to the right before pulling out, and therefore failed to notice that oncoming traffic.

The appropriate response to the oncoming traffic nearly hitting your van as a result of you suddenly pulling out having failed to look right is not 'oi you fucking bitch look where you're fucking going.' In addition, when the oncoming traffic, who happens to be female and on a bicycle, reminds you of the concept of 'right of way', the appropriate response is not to exit your vehicle in the middle of the road waving your arms in the air as you approach the female whilst saying 'I'll teach you a fucking lesson bitch'.

I unfortunately failed to collect your licence plate registration, or a description of you, as I was too busy cycling the fuck away as fast as I could.

Yours wishing you a painful accident preferably involving your genital region.

No love,
Me.

Comments

[camillastar.livejournal.com]

What a total bastard. I hate white van men, they are the scourge of the roads.

[miss-soap.livejournal.com]

The only upside to this is that when you yourself are driving a white van [as I will be this evening, helping chums buy stuff from Ikea] most people give you a very wide berth.

[emmelinemay.livejournal.com]

A few weeks ago, on the same road, one suddenly opened his van door forcing me to swerve into traffic. As i cycled past he shouted out 'nearly got ya'.

I HATE that road.

[yaruar.livejournal.com]

I find a quick release d-lock swiftly swung at the passenger window is the best response to this (rapidly followed by riding off quickly...)

[flavius-m.livejournal.com]

What an idiot. Glad you're ok. Pity you couldn't take his number although there's probably little that could be done.

[mr-foz.livejournal.com]

I hope that you're ok.

Hey!!!

[brute-force.livejournal.com]

I drive a white van...:(

Re: Hey!!!

[emmelinemay.livejournal.com]

do you drive like a total git?

Re: Hey!!!

[brute-force.livejournal.com]

well I drivwe with my knees while I do things with my hands.. does that count?

Re: Hey!!!

[emmelinemay.livejournal.com]

i think that's ok, as long as you don't try to kill cyclists!!

[bluekieran.livejournal.com]

Yes! Excellent idea, after all you don't have a license plate for them to take :)

[emmelinemay.livejournal.com]

i am fairly recognisable though...

[jez-alone.livejournal.com]

how scary....you did the right thing tho sweetie...who knows what that idiot would have done.

[chromenewt.livejournal.com]

From a man who is a recently recovering anger-holic, I can probably explain his reaction (and no, I'm not siding with him);

1 - Shit Driving) When the "Red Haze" is on there's a form of tunnel vision which isn't like looking trough a toilet roll tube, more like the ability to identify danger becomes very short range and gets prioritised by "size" of danger
2 - Defensive Accusation) When a mistake is made this causes anxiety and the need to divert blame becomes paramount. The easiest way to do this is to bring attention to the other party and "verbally program" those that didn't see it into visualising their version, thus gaining support
3 - Physical Agressive Behaviour) Now he's just a cunt that probably beats his wife/girlfriend/dog/small children/all of the above. He's now totally lost it and the only defence against this is the police/pepper spray/crow bar/H&K MP5 weilded by an SO19 officer.

1 and 2 I've done myself until recently when I realised I was a cunt to people, 3 I've thankfully never done to anyone that didn't actually deserve it and in fact I've only ever done 3 to those that have wound me up over a period of several minutes/hours/years. This makes me a lesser cunt, or him a Cuntus Gapus Maximus Rex.

So, in short it probably started with embarrassment but from your description he sounded the sort that would beat anyone into agreement, so you did exactly the right thing (although remember to take number plate next time). ;)

[http://users.livejournal.com/pablo___/]

You should get a red light, and tape it to your head, as well as a siren.

DRIVERS THESE DAYS?!
It makes me even more nervous.. being as I have to go for my learners licence soon.
But I promise- I'M NOT GOING TO TRY AND KILL CYCLISTS!

If theres a next time, you could be the accident that forces him into the emergency ward, involving a spanner and his genitalia.

[ephemera.livejournal.com]

Grrrrrr - not a good way to start the week at all!

[mazzmatazz.livejournal.com]

What a total and utter prick. It was a white van man that flipped my mate's car a couple years ago, wrote it off and could have killed her. She was lucky to get through with only minor injuries.

Part of why I don't drive is because most other people on the roads drive like knobs. I think everyone should be retested every couple years.

[lusercop.livejournal.com]

Eep! Poor you!

[emmelinemay.livejournal.com]

my main problem when i had my driving lessons (apart from having real problems getting that whole clutch/handbrake thing right) was the fact that i didn't trust ANYONE else on the road to not drive into me, and i felt really uneasy that i couldn't get a sense of how much space i took up.

I'm much happier on a bike as i know how much space i take up, i can see the road, i can see where i'm going and i don't have to rely on mirrors and things.

I still don't trust anyone else on the road though - i always try to look at the drivers to see if they've seen me before i cross in front of them.

With this guy he looked to the left, then only looked to the right AFTER he was pulling out. He's bloody lucky i wasn't a car, or a large bloke.

[angel-emma.livejournal.com]

FFS what a twat/cunt/git/bastard (delete as appropriate or leave all as he seems to deserve it).

Glad you're ok and so is your new bike (which your meez seems to love!!)

[emmelinemay.livejournal.com]

my meez LOVES my new bike :)

[mnowster.livejournal.com]

muthaf**kin sh*thead of unbelievable cu*tish-ness!!! I'm so glad you're ok though, that could have been really really nasty.

What kind of a man gets out of said van when he's in the wrong to chase after a female on a bike? I mean seriously, What...The..F8*k is wrong with people! I do my best to remain optimistic about the human race but f**kheads like that make me despair sometimes.

You did the right thing in getting the hell out of there and yay for super new bike that got you away quickly!

[preachermuaddib.livejournal.com]

*Hug*
Keep standing up for yourself honey.

I think I'll buy you a taser.

[load-of-flannel.livejournal.com]

I like to bend back the wing mirrors of pricks who drive in the cycle lane as I go past.

Militant bicycling is the way forward.

Its amazing how upset people get if you suddenly take out a camera phone as well... fortunately most car traffic doesnt stand a chance of catching up with you in mosty towns.

[cx650.livejournal.com]

"Yours wishing you a painful accident preferably involving your genital region"

Preferably involving another like-minded pillock.

Pleased you are OK.

[tiki-nightmare.livejournal.com]

i was knocked off my bike by a white van man several years ago.

He was turning right and 'didn't see me'. The luminous yellow jacket obviously didn't catch his eye!! :/

Be careful out there babe. i've been knocked off twice now and both times had a ride in an ambulance :(

Re: Hey!!!

[camillastar.livejournal.com]

All blondes are exempt from being scourges!!